I know that this emotional moment that I am having right now is a parenting moment. However, I think it is also so true of teaching as well. I have yet to introduce you to my Jason. Today's emotional parenting moment came when I watched this video, http://youtu.be/SN-H5lC16aE. My son is in that choir, and he is lifting his hand in worship to a wonderful God. You may be asking what that has to do with never, ever giving up. Well, it's a long story that will develop over time, but it is so worth every minute of it.
Jason wasn't always Jason. When I first met him, he went by another name. See, Jason was one of my high school sophomores, taking a math class that he didn't really like, with me as his teacher. At first, nothing stood out about Jason, other than the fact that he was in a class with a bunch of rough students, ones whose lives reflected much more strife than I had ever seen. He worked for me though. I remember seeing him at the end of first semester and letting him know he had passed my class with a C. He was so excited! Late in the second semester, it came to my knowledge that Jason was in the foster care system. Having been a foster parent in the past, I was interested in hearing more of his story. No details of that past will be shared, other than to say that it wasn't a pretty one.
I had been teaching almost 12 years at this point. I had seen many students who were in the foster care system. Something about Jason was different. Something about my life at that point was different. I decided to keep a better eye on his life by asking him to mow my lawn. It served both of us well. Jason made some extra cash and I was able to take care of other things around the house. Over the next couple months, Jason got to know my family, including my soon-to-be husband, Glenn. Glenn and I prayed for Jason, that he might not "age out" in the system. Jason came to me one day, telling me that he only had a few more days for his case worker to find a new placement for him or he would face a boys' home. Putting a 16 year-old boy in a boys' home usually leaves no hope for ever having a family. I didn't hesitate. I immediately told him that I had an extra bedroom; I used to do foster care; and that I was strict! What I could offer him was a family though, if he wanted that.
I don't know that Jason really knew what to expect in a family. He didn't have much of an example of one during the first 16 years of his life. The media sure wasn't going to give him a good view of family life. Our family wasn't the Brady Bunch. We certainly weren't the Kardashians. We were just "ordinary folk." We did, however, love our children enough to teach them right from wrong, to always tell them we love them, and to persevere through good times and bad.
We have had our ups and downs with Jason. You may hear of many of them as I continue to write this blog. Jason did come to live with me and my little Gabe. We moved in with my husband after the wedding. Jason was adopted almost a year after that. He had a hard time adjusting to the expectations of a family. Jason left home and returned multiple times. I hope that Jason and I can co-write a book one day about the ups and downs of adopting a teenager. I know he'd have a lot to add to it. There were so many times when I thought Jason was gone for good.
I truly believe that Jason would probably have gotten into some major trouble if our lives had not crossed. I don't take any credit for what Jason has now become, this young man who is standing in front of a group of people, worshipping God wholeheartedly. What happened to my son? See, Jason found a relationship with God. And Jason decided that, with God's help, he could become a better person. Praise God!
What does this mean for the classroom teacher? Well, you may not know it, but you have a "Jason" in your classroom. If you don't this year, you will have him another year. He will act out or he may just sit quietly, hoping that no one really notices him. I am not telling you to take him home and adopt him and watch him grow. I am just asking that you never, ever give up on your "Jason." See my Jason is my child, but that one in your classroom, he's also someone's child.
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